Fair warning: 4 minute read on advice I gave to someone I caught misbehaving on social media

At first, I didn’t know how to put it without sounding petty. My natural sarcastic tone wouldn’t fool anyone that I wasn’t. Besides, initially, I really wanted to smack someone’s head with a cast iron pan, but outrage repels clients and audiences. I decided that I will be kind instead because it is so fashionable these days, even though Keanu Reeves has been practicing kindness for decades under the radar up until the point we all understood he embodies the very word.

Back to the petty issue that is not intended to sound like a petty issue.

So I was scrolling down my FB feed one morning and found words that resonated strongly with me. The more I read the more they resonated. It took me about ten seconds to realize why.

They were my words. In somebody else’s post. Without any credit whatsoever!

Yet another expert decided that teaching a bit about image will be a nice addition to her differently focused services.

But honestly; there is no grace or integrity in

1. Pretending to be an expert in something you are not and trying to charge the unsuspecting public for superficial advice you read on your FB friend’s timeline for free.
2. Taking other person’s words of advice and putting it neatly into a long blogpost as your own with no proper credit
3. When confronted, pretending that you have no idea what I am talking about.

You see, I am aware that it is tempting to use my generous free advice, run with it, repackage it and sell it as your own. However, you might like to know when it comes to depth of colour advice, the free stuff you read on my news feed is only about 10% of my colour knowledge. I am terribly flattered that you find even this small bit valuable. It is my intention – to give value first — but not knowing exactly what you are doing and pretending that you do, will bite you in the backside before you know it.

How do I know?

I have been there. Years ago, when I first started my styling business, I thought that having a sense for my own style and reading one book on what clothing goes with what body type was sufficient to give advice on style for money.

One client in and I very quickly understood that unless I risk being marked as a snake-oil peddler I have to learn A LOT and pronto!

And so I did.

A few thousands of dollars for professional training and dozens of free colour analysis later to practice I began to understand how colours work. Thinking about image in terms of black vs. colours is naïve, shallow, and very unprofessional.

Of course I compensated the lady with my free time and a proper consultation but I never stopped learning. And I don’t claim any skill I don’t have. Interestingly enough, people find it refreshing when I am honest.

In addition, once – also in my early styling days (and I am not particularly proud of this one) – I simply screenshotted somebody else’s styling set of pictures and posted them on twitter without any credit. Back then, I had no idea how much work, time and knowledge must have gone into creating them, and I so desperately wanted to look professional, so I did it. Luckily, my mentor paid attention to my moves on social media and let me know instantly that stealing other people’s work is not the way to make my name in the image business.

Because things in life do come full circle in the second half of your life, as I am constantly discovering, I want to do you a favour before it’s too late.

Because of my kind heart, let me give you a few examples of how to share other people’s content properly, so your clients can value your professional help and you can have a good look in the mirror and value yourself:

Invite me or any other mentor you ‘borrow’ their know-how from as your guest on your podcast, FB life, YouTube video, or your blog, give them a proper introduction and ask intelligent questions that your audience will appreciate. Thus, you will come out as an expert who knows other experts so your credibility increases, you come out as a professional, and your reach will grow as the invited experts will share your podcast with their audiences as well. In addition, your calendar will be full before you know it and people will know you as a kind, knowledgeable and worthy-of-their-time expert.

If you don’t do it, you become a thief, unable to create her own content or come up with her own ideas.

Unfriending or blocking the person whom you take content from and making it your own will not help your situation. People have friends, I mean real friends, who will report you and make their circle know about your behavior.

The ideal step right now would be to approach the people who inspire you either privately or publicly, apologize, because we are forgiving, and follow the procedure recommended in this post. Otherwise, your name alongside with all the screenshots may or may not appear somewhere when you least need it or expect it.

Once again, I am flattered but please don’t steal from me. For both our sakes.

Your caring FB friend,